I heard this metaphor and have tried to apply its wisdom into my daily life.

I thought it was important enough to share. Special thanks to Rabbi Shaul Youdkevitch and my environmentalist wife, Ellen, for their input into this article.

Think of people as fruit on a tree. In general, fruit that are still on a tree, taste bitter. Fruit needs to be harvested carefully and allowed to ripen at its own time and pace to achieve its maximum sweetness.

Usually, this harvesting is done with tender loving care, so as to ensure the fruit will not become blemished or bruised and thus will lose its potential for sweetness. 

The fruit which is not harvested will eventually fall to the ground, and will spoil and then become fertilizer for the earth or fodder (food for animals to eat). It is important to note that this fruit, too, has a purpose.

This metaphor is our guide to how to look at and treat others.

First off, never judge a fruit because you have “taken a bite” of it too soon. Either you have partaken of it on the tree or from the ground. These are the people who leave “a bitter taste in our mouth”. “I don’t know, I just don’t like that person”. 

Judging a fruit/person before it is ripe is, quite frankly, unfair.

It hasn’t matured, grown or come into its own yet.

So for people who are “not our cup of tea”, let them be. Don’t judge them. And, most importantly, don’t give up on them.

Not to forget, the “lucky” fruit are the ones harvested with care and gentleness and therefore have the best chance of having a “good taste”.  

We are the lucky ones who have had good teacher(s), loving parent(s), caring friend(s), etc. So if you find an unripened or “fallen” fruit, take the chance to nurture it and allow it to come into its full potential (sweetness/good taste).

This viewpoint can help in friendships, marriages and business relationships.

Part of the job of us “lucky ones” is the following:

  1. Understand that it takes all types of fruit/people and varieties that are at different stages of growth in our social world.
  2. Be prepared to change your opinion about your first experience with the fruit/person because they may convert from bitter to sweet.
  3. In the grand scheme of things, every fruit/person has a purpose and a value that must be respected for that purpose.  

In a nutshell: Don’t judge others too quickly, have a reverence for all life, and make an effort to always be in a respectful, grateful state of mind.

Hope this metaphor resonates with you as much as it has for me.